my mom.

This is my mom.

I've posted about her before because she's a talented and creative Etsy shop owner who helped me through my first big craft fair. I wouldn't have survived Lorelei's babyhood without her daily (hourly?) phone calls, long visits where she cooked whatever I wanted and cleaned my house without being asked, and hundreds of supportive emails. I'm hanging in there as a new mom of two because she's done more of the same this time around. I am only now beginning to appreciate all that she did for us growing up that made my childhood so happy and fostered an incredibly close relationship between my brother and I - and continues to do for my two girls, even from afar.

Right before Phoebe was born, my mom was diagnosed with a type of endometrial cancer. After struggling for years with infertility in her 20s, she found out she had endometriosis and was lucky to have successful treatment that enabled her to get pregnant - with me! But endometriosis never goes away, and a very unfortunate few wind up getting cancer from all the crazy growth that keeps happening as a result. My mom is one of those. Her surgery one week after Phoebe's birth went well - things are looking good, overall - but she still has to go through 6 rounds of chemotherapy, which start Friday.

I wish more than anything right now that we lived in the same town so I could be there for those marathon chemo sessions and to help her the way she helped me through my bout with cancer and through everything else over the years. Instead, I'll be sending care packages through the mail and prayers through the ether. If you're the praying type, or the "sending good vibes" type, that would be wonderful, too.

10 years later.

image

Ten years ago this afternoon, I was waking up from major surgery. The image of my aunt clutching my hand and bursting into tears as I lay on a gurney earlier that morning was still burned in my brain. I was groggy, sore, nauseated. And so grateful to hear my doctor telling me that they got it all.

The 5-year survival rate for ovarian cancer is 44% - luckily, the kind of cancer I had is much gentler than that with a rate of around 98%. Once I'm done having children, I'll go back to see an gyn-oncologist and most likely have a radical hysterectomy to prevent late recurrence, which is unfortunately common for my type of tumor. You can learn more about my experience here, if you're interested.

Celebrating with hope and gratitude today. Hope you'll take a moment to give thanks for something meaningful in your life today, too.

adventures in motherhood: lights, camera, action.

I seriously do not know how you bloggers who have kiddos who don't take any naps do it. I can't even post regularly now that Lorelei takes only one! You're killing me, Smalls!

Things I've been preoccupied by this week:

1. Lights. As in, all of the lighting fixtures in my house. We're trying to make some small changes around here to get everything ready to put our house on the market in February (the start of buying season around these parts), and if you've been following my Pinterest board you can see that I've been light obsessed. I feel like ceiling lights are things that potential buyers won't notice unless they're hideous -- a category ours probably fall under at the moment. I'm thinking a trip to Ikea this weekend might be in order...any other great on-the-cheap home furnishing suggestions?

the only light I've decided on so far: two of these will hang (close to the ceiling) in the kitchen

2. Camera. Still don't have mine fixed, and my newest shop updates are looking a little worse for the wear with the point-and-shoot I'm using instead. Oh well. I did manage to get some cute pictures of Lorelei recently, though of course when I look at them I just see the ways in which my "real" camera would have captured the moment more perfectly. First world problems? Yep, definitely.

3. Action. I've been on the phone with repairmen -- and meeting with them -- a lot more than I would like in terms of my dreams about how to spend my free time, but at least we're making some headway on the house. New range hood? New faucet for our kitchen sink? Estimate on painting the exterior wood trim a color other than bright yellow (you can sort of see it in that photo above -- color suggestions?)? Check, check, check. Next up: getting an electrician in here to install all our new lights...once I order them, that is! It feels good to be finally jumping feet/head/everything first into this project, since I've been wanting to update our house since we moved in and it just never seemed like we should take the time/effort/money to do it. At least we'll get to enjoy it for a few months before we move, right? :)

p.s. 3 more days of knowing that your larking. purchase is going to support the fight against ovarian cancer!

a heartfelt thank you.

Thank you, thank you, thank you for your kind words and well wishes in response to my post yesterday.

I'm excited to have a (slightly) public forum in which to help fight the good fight against ovarian cancer now -- September is going to be a big month for me! And to thank you for your support, I'd like to offer you, the amazing regular readers of my blog, a 9% discount on any larking. purchase you make during the month of September in honor of my 9 years of staying cancer-free. Starting tomorrow, please enter 9FREE at checkout to take advantage of the discount.

I'm also excited to be entering the world of direct checkout -- by early next week, you will no longer need a PayPal account to make purchases in my shop! This also means that the brand spankin' new Etsy gift cards (available soon!) will be available for use on larking., as well.

Happy weekend, all, and thanks again for your support!

the post where I tell you that I'm a cancer survivor.

If you know me IRL, you probably think this post is a long time coming. It just hasn't felt right until now, for some reason. But yesterday I got that magic phone call that lets me exhale in such a big way even though I don't fully realize I've been holding my breath. The one where the nurse says "Your blood work came back negative." 9 years later, it never gets old.

Just like the ACS, I, too, am an official sponsor of birthdays.

Ovarian cancer. At age 22. Thank goodness for annual exams and doctors who are thorough and careful. Thankful, too, that a grapefruit-sized mass somehow stayed within my left ovary and didn't spread anywhere else, so no chemo or radiation. And very thankful my doctors talked me into keeping the other ovary intact to preserve my fertility, even though it means more surgery once I'm done having children, since I was lucky enough to get a type of ovarian cancer that can recur even 20 or 30 years later. The 6-inch vertical scar is still red but looks less angry now -- and I'm less angry now, too. Less scared. But still angry and scared, sometimes.

Last August was the worst -- even worse than the weeks before my surgery, because then it was just me and now, well, it isn't. Sitting in the doctor's office in that stupid paper robe and hearing the nurse shout down the hall to someone else, "Looks like she's got a mass on that remaining ovary." Waiting and waiting for the doctor to come in and trying to pretend I hadn't already heard, for some strange reason. Crying when I sang lullabies to Lorelei and knowing she would never remember them. And then getting the phone call that said the blood work results were negative, the ultrasound looked fine after all, that follow-up tests weren't necessary any more. That time, I had been holding my breath so much it hurt.

So I'm celebrating. And trying to raise awareness. If you have been putting off making that doctor's appointment, call now. And if everything turns out to be fine, the co-pay will still be the best $25 or $50 you spent this month. Because peace of mind and good health are totally worth it.

My amazing caregivers from the Fairview Women's Clinic are never far from my mind. If you're in Minnesota, consider participating in the Silent No More Walk/Run on September 8th at Rosland Park in Edina. Learn more about it here. There are events in Pennsylvania and Nebraska on the 8th, too -- check here to see how you can participate in these events and others during September (aka ovarian cancer awareness month).

On September 7th, participate in Wear Teal Day to raise awareness for a silent killer with a 47% five-year survival rate (just as an FYI, it's 90% for breast cancer based on 2007 stats).

Starting on September 1st and lasting all month long, all the proceeds I make in shop sales will go to the fight against ovarian cancer. And I have one more fundraiser I'll be promoting here on the blog, so stay tuned for more details.