Friday, May 11, 2012

reason #4875 the mommy wars are ridiculous

blah blah blah TIME magazine cover blah blah blah. Haven't we had enough already? Why do we continue to allow the media to bait us into this tired old cat fight? Instead, how about taking a moment to admire my daughter, shrieking joyfully at a robin nearby, in a dress that used to be mine 30 years ago:

Ahhh, that's better.

I could write paragraph after paragraph after paragraph about my feelings on the dreaded mommy wars, but here's a brief argument I'd like to hear more people making:

As I've told you before, I'm an ESTJ and a One. I'm a natural teacher, organizer, and administrator as a result.  I need organization, order, and routine in order to thrive -- as well as regular contact with people. I'm incredibly efficient and competent at a lot of things, so I'm your go-to gal to get stuff done right. I get overwhelmed by chaos and disruption to my schedule, and surprises throw me into a tailspin to the point where I can sink into a funk that lasts for hours or days.

A very dear friend of mine is an ESFP and a Seven. She needs spontaneity, change, and excitement. She would be miserable if not surrounded by a wide circle of friends, has no problem bucking a trend or schedule in order to grab a last-minute opportunity even if it means blowing someone or something off, and feels tied down and restless if she doesn't have a calendar bursting with social obligations and new adventures. She is a lover of life in an infectious way -- being around her is uplifting and refreshing.

It doesn't take much to realize that we would be best suited for very different kinds of jobs, living environments, long-term partners or spouses, and life goals.

So why in the world would anyone think that one single parenting philosophy would be best for both of us? Especially when you have the personality of a child to consider, as well?

Think it's time for another mood-lifter:

Happy Friday, all! Tell the mom in your life how much you value her unique style of parenting and get her some chocolate, already!


  1. what a great approach to all this silliness.

  2. So well put. And that dress is beautiful.

  3. goodness gracious that old dress is beautiful on your babe! I also agree with you entirely on the mommy wars subject.

  4. I've never heard of Enneagram, but now I'm curious to know what number I am! Also, that dress is so precious. Love!

    1. PJ, the Enneagram is the best tool I've found when it comes to understanding your personality -- it gets to the heart of how your greatest needs and fears shape who you are. The type indicator "test" is rather long but worth it, IMO.

  5. She really is a mood lifter - and that dress!
    I absolutely agree with you, and I think most moms believe in that same sort of respect (and chocolate!). The controversy that the media is stirring up simply isn't there for most of us, at least not under normal circumstances. So let's just keep on staring at those gorgeous babies and finding things to admire about each other, eh?

  6. I absolutely agree. TO EACH THEIR OWN. Your daughter is adorable by the way :)

  7. I totally agree with you!! It's funny how much mom's feel like they need to battle each other! Stop worrying about what other mom's are doing, and start enjoying your own kids!!
    ♥ Kyna

  8. She is SO CUTE. And everything else you said is exactly right. My mind is BOGGLED at this whole thing. I just at all. I read and linked some great articles that I found to be encouraging, and besides that, I'm not going to think about it at all.

  9. Oh my word. She is simply the cutest!