if I were in charge of the Olympics.

my husband atop a college "art installation" known as "The Lazy Shopper"

(not one of our suggested new Olympics events)

My husband has a quirky sense of humor (some of our earliest times together consisted of listening to Wesley Willis songs and playing "Would You Rather"), so it's fairly commonplace for him to ask me totally bizarre questions as a form of entertainment. While watching the Olympics last night, we spent an hour coming up with the Olympics events we think are sorely lacking from the current lineup. Here's what we think athletes should be competing in:

100m dash and 400m hurdles on pogo stick

100, 200, and 400m skip (there would need to be "style judges" to make sure the skipping was done properly)

something involving jumping rope really really fast -- still need to work out the details

a whole category of sliding events: slip-n-slide, Alpine slide, and water slide (we spent quite a while debating whether the water slides should be enclosed and the potential difficulties of rigging cameras inside so you would have footage of the whole event)

vertical wall climb (we briefly considered, but rejected, any American Gladiator-esque obstacles like Nitro climbing up after you and trying to pull you down)

bombardment -- unless it seems too unsportsmanlike for the Olympics, in which case we'll just leave it for the 3rd graders

What events would you add to the Olympics if you could?